A major research institution has recently announced the discovery of the heaviest element yet known to science. This new element has been tentatively named “Administratium.”
Administratium has 1 neutron, 12 assistant neutrons, 75 deputy neutrons, and 111 assistant deputy neutrons, giving it an atomic mass of 312.
These 312 particles are held together by a force called morons, which are surrounded by vast quantities of lepton-like particles called peons.
Since Administratium has no electrons, it is inert. However, it can be detected as it impedes every reaction with which it comes into contact.
A minute amount of Administratium causes one reaction to take over 4 days to complete, when it would normally take less than a second.
Administratium has a normal half-life of 3 years; it does not decay, but instead undergoes a reorganization, in which a portion of the assistant neutrons and deputy neutrons and assistant deputy neutrons exchange places.
In fact, Administratium’s mass will actually increase over time, since each reorganization causes some morons to become neutrons forming isodopes.
This characteristic of moron-promotion leads some scientists to speculate that Administratium is formed whenever morons reach a certain quantity in concentration. This hypothetical quantity is referred to as
You will know it when you see it.
Reported by: Daniel
It’s the tail. It wags and wags and wags….We have a new rating for Cali, it is similar to the quarterback rating of touchdowns over interceptions.
Doggie Bonus = (cute girls drawn over) / (accidents in the house)
So far Cali is pretty far below 1, but she’s on the board!
What reading 3 books about Labrador Retrievers doesn’t tell you is that reading the body language of dogs is very tough. It’s 9 o’clock, and we’ve had Cali for 6 hours. I slept on the floor with her for a good hour of it, then she had her first little accident. She’s been taken outside 3 times, with Sara currently outside on the fourth….but somehow she seems to like our floors rather than the outside area. Accident count: 2, the second was minutes after she came inside again….doh!
To be fair, Cali is the cutest thing we’ve ever seen.
Tomorrow Sara and I are driving out to Shirley, Long Island and picking up Cali. She’s a black Labrador Retriever puppy about 7 1/2 weeks old. Her official B-Day is February 27th. She’ll get her own hexagon on the buzolich.com website….kinda like the Hollywood Walk of Fame, but different. Her page will have lots of pictures of her and a blog of my attempts to control pure energy. Do you have any good dog training tips? Please post them!
There is something soothing about watching the wisps of fog roll across the housetops in San Francisco. We had a warm, sunny day in Los Altos Hills with Sam’s family. We spent Easter coloring Easter eggs and then hunting for ones filled with candy. Dinner was lamb with mint jelly, asparagus, and potatoes with the optional ranch dressing (Thanks John). Arlene was nice enough to introduce me to a little deer named, “Yes”….I think we’ll be having an interesting relationship.
Many thanks to the Melens for a great Easter and to Chez Hugo for a great weekend. New York is supposed to be very nice in the spring… 🙂
Out on the West Coast this weekend. It’s nice to be back at Chez Hugo and see the boys. Wonder where Hoolie was last night? Planning on a good long hike to a waterfall and hopefully some nice beach time and kite flying. Kendall was a big fan of getting a dog. That makes the count: Lab 1, Sara 0.
To Dog or not To Dog, that is the question. Whether tis nobler to get a pet rider from the building management, or simply listen to the advice from our fleet of doormen when asked how do I get a dog, “You just buy a puppy.” Those guys rock!